Who’s That On Your Profile Pic?

I’m revisiting a rant from my pre-Wordpress days. I don’t know why it made me so many enemies at the time. Not real enemies I guess, but there were a lot of people with differing opinions about it, and that makes me happy because I do like to stir it up from time to time.

On a Facebook status update I once said that I hated it when people used pictures of their children as their profile pics. Last night at a bar, a friend fondly recalled this as me ‘hating when people post pictures of their kids on Facebook’. That is NOT EVEN THE SAME THING!

Facebook logo

I have this belief that a Facebook profile picture should be a picture of the person whose profile it is. Call me old-fashioned! This is the picture that I see when I’m trying to figure out who you are. This is the picture that I see when you leave a comment on my page. Sometimes when people have babies, they like to put a picture of the baby as their profile pic. I don’t like that! If your kid needs to be the profile pic, then maybe it’s time for them to have their own page.

I’m not suggesting that you shouldn’t have pictures of your kids on Facebook. Post as many pics of your kids as you want!! In photo albums. I love seeing your beautiful families. Just not on the profile pic. That should be you. Can it be a pic with you with your kid? Sure…. but not your kid solo. It irritates me.

Maybe it’s because when I see a Facebook comment, I like to look at the person’s picture and imagine them saying that to me. Or maybe it’s just that I don’t want to picture a newborn baby delivering a social commentary about how the mayor of Toronto is a crackhead, or a 4-year-old posting a YouTube clip of a Led Zeppelin video. Take responsibility for your status updates, and stop hiding behind your kids. It’s like not looking me in the eye when you talk to me.

When I first presented this idea to people, I got a lot of that ‘When you have a kid, you’ll understand’ business. Well I do have a kid now, and as much as it pains me to say, he’s substantially better looking than I am. While I’m happy to share that with my Facebook friends, I do not do so in the form of a profile pic….. cuz it aint his profile!!!

I know what you’re thinking….. what kind of thing is this to care about?? How much extra emotional energy does this guy have to be irritated by something so unimportant and trivial? It may surprise you (but at the 457 character mark, it shouldn’t because I never wrap up this quickly) that this is actually part of a bigger philosophy I have about parenting. I lacked credibility before I had a kid, so people didn’t want to hear my opinion on this, but like all the other parents who think they’re so damn smart because they managed to create a human (and they didn’t even have to go to school for it), I now would like to present my advice on parenting. Please feel free to give feedback, or to ignore as you see fit.

I think that too many parents give too much of themselves to the endeavour of raising their kids. There seems to be a breed of super-parents who have no lives outside of their kids. I don’t mean to criticize this because in a way, it’s the most selfless thing you can do. I’m certainly not suggesting that you should have kids without the intention of going ‘all-in’ either…. that wouldn’t be right. Somewhere along the line though, the world has seen armies of interesting people get into the ‘human creation’ game, and come out the other side ‘not-too-interesting’. I can see how it happens too. This is an all-consuming undertaking, this parenting thing…. not for the weak-hearted!

Maybe there’s a way we can do this without totally losing our identity though…. maybe there’s a way we can ‘keep our own photo as our profile pic’ so to speak…..I know there’s not a lot of time to do things we want to do, and when we get that extra time, the first thing we think of is what else can we do for our children…. which is great! I’m sure they appreciate it.

The thing is that one day they’ll get older. One day, they’ll want to know about YOUR life. One day, they’ll want to know that YOU had hopes and dreams, and at least occasionally went after them. At the time that they reach a certain age and have their own family, they might want to know that YOU didn’t just shut it down and live through them exclusively, but that maybe YOU still had a few tricks up your sleeve, and maybe YOU were someone interesting who they could really look up to.

So all you super-parents out there, I’m sure your babies appreciate all you do for them, and this isn’t meant to be-little any of the sacrifices you make. It’s just to remind you that your babies want you to be happy, even if they don’t know it yet. They want you to still live your life (or at least as much of it as you have time for). Most importantly your babies want you to be a person of interest, not just their parent. They won’t be offended if you take back your identity…. they’ll respect you for it in the end (providing you don’t do a complete 180 and start becoming a crappy parent, that’s not what I’m trying to say). Take some of your life back if you can! Start with that profile pic. YOU ARE STILL A PERSON!

A message of inspiration from Thoughts and Rants in Jogging Pants 🙂

About Thoughts and Rants in Jogging Pants

I'm a music lover, an enthusiast, a diaper changer, an opinion sharer, a chicken wing consumer, a procrastinating couch sitter, an actor, a business professional, a foodie, an above average dresser, and blogger at www.thoughtsandrantsinjoggingpants.com View all posts by Thoughts and Rants in Jogging Pants

13 responses to “Who’s That On Your Profile Pic?

  • iamtomnardone

    Maybe I did beat you to the Rudolph the red nose reindeer but you beat me to this one. I HATE when people post their kids pictures for Facebook. You are right. They are wrong. You are awesome, and I am thankful for your being so.

    tom

  • LisaAR

    I absolutely agree that we need to model being a healthy, balanced person (to the best of our ability) for our kids. Not doing so is not only a disservice to us, but also to them. Too many kids are certain the world revolves completely around them. They are in for a rude awakening.

  • journeyofjordannaeast

    This post is hilarious and I’ll tell you why. I recently got a new cell phone and when I went to configure the Facebook app, the app didn’t recognize my new device. I had to “correctly identify” several people on my friends list in order for it to believe it was me, not some hacker. That was all well and good except they only allow you a certain number of “passes” and several of my stupid friends had their baby or their car or their new pair of Jordans as their freaking profile picture. Yes, Jordans as in sneakers. I barely regained access to my mobile Facebook account. By the skin of one remaining “pass,” in fact.

  • lostnchina

    Actually, I only oppose ppl’s kids as FB profile pics, because a profile pic is PUBLIC, which means anyone can see it. Any yahoo searching on FB can see it, see the parent’s name and the kid’s picture…it’s just not safe and poor judgement, in my opinion. And how about those ppl who put up a whole profile for their 2 year old toddler who can’t even use the computer or speak in complete sentences. Those parents post the kids’ pics online, without the toddler’s permission?

    • Thoughts and Rants in Jogging Pants

      Yessss…… I also feel like it’s an invasion of kid’s privacy. People laugh when I say that, but it’s true. The parent is supposed to make those decisions on behalf of the kid, until the kid is old enough to do so. My son is super cute!! I’m dying to post a million pictures and videos of him, but until I’m confident that he wants me to……I won’t be.

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