I hate it when people say Carpe Diem. I don’t know why. It’s supposed to inspire you to do things. It doesn’t work for me. Too many people say it. Too many Non-Latin Day Seizers out there for my liking. Don’t tell me to seize the day. You seize the day and show me how awesome it was, and then I’ll want to do it myself. Lead by example! What’s the Latin terminology for that?? According to the Internet it’s ‘plumbum per exempoator’!!!! I know…… Not so catchy is it? Carpe Diem is easy. Convenient! Lazy! I feel like it’s a way to make yourself sound interesting by using a different language, and saying something uplifting at the same time. I’m going to come up with a new catch phrase that you can all start using. It will mean something to me when I hear it. It will mean something to everyone when they hear it. It won’t be some vague instruction, but it won’t be so specific to any one situation so as not to make sense in others. It will also be in English. The only language I speak. This is gold. Are you ready????
‘Finish That Thing You Started!’
Well??? What do you think? Is that Nike calling me for slogan rights? Status updates will never be the same. This has crazy T-Shirt potential. There’s not a person on the planet that can’t relate to that message, and get inspired to do whatever that little project was that they always wanted to do, but never found the time. Finish it!!!! You’re welcome Oprah!
OK, I can’t go on like this….. I don’t really feel like writing a full blog on one idea. Which is good and bad for me. Good because I don’t have to burn a lot of creativity trying to stretch out a mediocre topic, but bad because I will have to burn 3 or 4 blog ideas just to get up to my usual word count. So without further ado, (and fully in the spirit of finishing what I started) I bring you…..
– I saw a bus ad the other day for a website, and they don’t reveal the company’s name (yet…..I’m sure I will have to see two or three more teasers first….awesome). In the picture, there’s a guy in a scuba suit in a cage in the ocean with a bunch of sharks swimming around, and he’s giving a thumbs up to the camera (which I’m assuming indicates that he’s there by choice). The poster says ‘What does your freedom look like?’ To that I say….. ‘I just hope it doesn’t look like I’m trapped in a cage with a bunch of hungry sharks swimming around.’ That looks way more like confinement to me, but different strokes for different folks I guess.
– Also on the bus (man, I could have made this a ‘shit I see on the bus’ blog, and used the Carpe Diem thing later. Oh well), I saw a lady who had hair down to the backs of her knees, which is bad enough. She was wearing a jacket, and the hair was tucked into the jacket. Unfortunately the jacket only went down to her waist, so the rest of her hair was showing below her jacket, effectively making her a horse. Sexy.
– I saw a quick story about Arizona executing a prisoner for a 1991 murder. I don’t have strong feelings about the death penalty either way (other than you better be damn sure you got your man), but isn’t the whole point so you can save money? What’s the point of feeding someone and giving him free rent for 20 years if you’re just going to kill him anyways?
– There’s a TV commercial with Jennifer Garner, and at the end she’s holding up a makeup remover with a bunch of removed makeup on it and she says ‘does your makeup remover do this’? Now I don’t wear makeup, so I may not be the best person to ask, but if I did, and someone asked me ‘does your makeup remover do this?’, and then pointed at the makeup remover which had successfully removed the makeup?? My answer would be ‘I sure fuckin hope so!’
December 11th, 2012 at 1:49 pm
Well, being an Italian who received a classic scholar education, I gotta tell you that Carpe Diem (quam minimum credula postero) is not used to make people do stuff whenever they’re lazy and it should not be associated to that meaning. It’s said in one of those topic life-changing situations where you have to “catch today” (because you don’t know what tomorrow may hold) – literal translation for “carpe diem” – otherwise “today” will pass and you will never have that chance again. I.E: a super important job interview that you don’t feel confident enough to sustain, a love that is about to part from you forever and you don’t know whether to say goodbye. Orazio, the poet who first used this phrase in one of his poems, gave it a very dramatic meaning pointing out how life is transitional and time is vain and all good things finish and we’re only mortals. So next time someone uses that phrase (that I think italians only use on a handful of occasions) with you to tell you to catch the bus or finish an email, tell them the story and make them feel like the morons that they are. 😀
December 12th, 2012 at 2:55 am
I don’t know if I’ll remember all that, but I can copy and paste it if I need to 😉 I just don’t think people are having ‘life changing’ situations as often as their Facebook statuses would seem to indicate.
December 12th, 2012 at 2:19 am
Carpe Diem be damned! Try getting pushed around a TTC bus and then say Carpe Diem! Bah!
And don’t get me started on those freedom ads. What the hell are they about!?! I thought I was just stupid and missing something. I saw one of this guy on the peak of a snowy mountain in the middle of nowhere, not exactly dressed weather-appropriate, playing the drums, looking as happy as a clam. That poster emulated a blend of all my worst nightmares: being alone, freezing in the winter, winter, lack of food (or worse- a Starbucks in close proximity) being stranded…
You are such a hilarious complainer. I actually really look forward to your posts and laugh out loud when I read your stuff.
December 12th, 2012 at 3:03 am
Thanks Selena Gomez 😉
I think it’s a banking/personal finance/retirement savings kind of thing if I had to guess, but what unpleasant thing will they choose next? A guy with his head inside of a crocodile’s mouth?
December 12th, 2012 at 8:42 pm
hahah yes. My name is Selena from now on.
How funny would it be if they actually chose a guy with his head in a crocodile! Hah.